March 21, 2013

White House Petition: Make Lawmakers Wear Logos Of Financial Backers On Clothing, Like In NASCAR

From the depths of the White House's "We the People" petition website comes this cause created on Tuesday, hoping to force congressional lawmakers to prominently display their financial backers and monetary support from various lobbies.
Since most politicians' campaigns are largely funded by wealthy companies and individuals, it would give voters a better sense of who the candidate they are voting for is actually representing if the company's logo, or individual's name, was prominently displayed upon the candidate's clothing at all public appearances and campaign events. Once elected, the candidate would be required to continue to wear those "sponsor's" [sic] names during all official duties and visits to constituents. The size of a logo or name would vary with the size of a donation. For example, a $1 million dollar contribution would warrant a patch of about 4" by 8" on the chest, while a free meal from a lobbyist would be represented by a quarter-sized button. Individual donations under $1000 are exempt.
While such a change in the rules would not actually lie within the executive branch's purview -- and would likely break House and Senate dress code -- the petition is indicative of what has become the site's de facto function, to serve as a clearing house for a wide variety of proposals of both the novel and novelty variety.
After a slew of petitions calling for everything from a state-by-state secession from the union to the construction of a Star Wars-style "Death Star," the White House upped their signature threshold from the previous 25,000 to 100,000. The "make lawmakers look like NASCAR drivers" one in particular still has a very long way to go.
Some legitimate petitions have since met the new benchmark, however. A call for the White House to prevent a controversial cybersecurity bill from becoming law and another protesting the suspension of the military's popular tuition assistance programhave surged past 100,000 signatures in recent weeks. But that hasn't discouraged jokers from submitting less serious ideas, such as a petition calling for President Barack Obama to change the national anthem to R. Kelly's 2003 hit "Ignition (Remix)."

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